Being a Strategic Dad with Bryan Miles, Ep #4

April 20, 2023

The world doesn’t need another brewery. The world needs places for community. The world needs more places to build meaningful connections. The world needs better dads. There aren’t a lot of forums for dads to meet and learn how to be better. That’s why Bryan Miles was excited to partner with Dads on Tap. His brewery, NoFo Brew Co., is one of our partners, based in Cumming, GA. In this episode, Bryan shares how he invests his time in his wife and kids as a busy entrepreneur.

You will want to hear this episode if you are interested in...

Learn more about NoFo Brewing Company [1:20]
Why the Dads on Tap movement is important to Bryan [4:13]
What Bryan learned from his dad about being a dad [6:18]
Learn more about Bryan and his family [7:30]
How Bryan and his wife operate in times of conflict [9:21]
How Bryan strategically invests in his kids [12:40]
The values that Bryan embraces as a dad [16:00]
How to make sure your kids are listening to the right voices [19:56]
Bryan shares about a milestone in the “Miles Family Manifesto” [24:33]
The areas you need to be more careful as a dad [27:36]
Bryan’s challenge: How to become a better dad [31:00]

How Bryan and his wife navigate parenting

Bryan has been married for 25 years. They've learned that the best thing you can give your kids is a great marriage. So they’re careful to be in lockstep on what’s important for their family and their marriage, always defaulting to each other’s strengths.

Because they both have busy schedules and run multiple businesses, Bryan is strategic about spending time with his kids. He spends one-on-one time with them and asks them questions about what they need.

He recently had his son and daughter take the Myers-Briggs assessment and helped them unpack what their results meant. His goal was to help them see that they’re each unique individuals with strengths and weaknesses. It gives them a model for their future so they can appreciate their differences.

Make sure your kids are listening to the right voices (and developing their own)

As a dad, who are you looking to as a mentor? Who can guide you in your life, because you don’t have all the answers? Sit down with them and ask them to teach you. Ask them for resources. Be proactive. Bryan always seeks out mentors—who are more experienced and in a different season of life—in business, marriage, spirituality, etc., and teaches his kids to do the same thing.

Secondly, your friends determine the trajectory of your life. He’s careful to have conversations with his kids to help demonstrate this point and make sure it’s practically applied in their lives.

Bryan jokes that the golden age of being a parent is between diapers and driver’s licenses. The early days are about teaching them boundaries and what to think. As they get older, it’s about teaching them how to think for themselves. At some point, they’ll have to make difficult decisions on their own when their parents can’t bail them out.

The areas you need to be more careful as a dad

Bryan points out that if he’s not careful, as a brewery owner, it can be very easy to let alcohol start to play a role in their story. He has to be incredibly responsible.

Secondly, many dads deal with anger. When things don’t go your way, you try to stuff it down, right? But then you become passive-aggressive and angry. Bryan manages those emotions by working out consistently, having open conversations with his family, and setting aside time to process his emotions.

When you show up as a father, you’re a giant to your children. Your words can be harsh and they can be loving. When you talk as a dad, you have to be cognizant of how you speak to your children. You want them to crave time with you.

How to become a better dad

Bryan emphasizes that you have to be a well-rounded dad. You can’t be wildly successful in business but let your marriage become a trainwreck. You need to show your kids that you prioritize your relationships—with them, your spouse, and with God. You also need to prioritize your health and well-being.

You also need to be a leader worth following. You need to have integrity. You need to be able to ask someone to do something that you’d do yourself. And make sure your home is one full of grace. When anyone makes a mistake, apologize, forgive, and move on.

Lastly, don’t give up. Fight for your family. The world needs you as a great dad. Find a space where you can have conversations with other dads. When dads step up and own who they are, everything changes.